There are some pretty heated debates within Christian circles about whether or not you should defend yourself. Proponents of defense remind us that Peter told us to be ready to give an answer to anyone who asks (1 Peter 3:15), as well as examples of Paul defending himself verbally (for example, in Acts 22). The best text is 1 Peter 2:15: “It is God’s will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish people.” On the other side of the debate, the proof text is that we should turn the other cheek (Matthew 5:39) and not get caught up in useless quarrels (2 Timothy 2:23). After all, God can protect your reputation a lot better than you can.
As Americans, we often feel we have a right to be heard and that justice requires us to prove we are right. So it’s very tempting to defend ourselves and our actions verbally, especially when we’re disproving a lie by speaking the truth.
However, defending ourselves usually leads to strife. Especially because, often, while defending ourselves, we put other people down. I don’t see God’s heart in putting others down, even if it makes you look good for Godly purposes.
This is why, when we face a situation where someone (or many people) is misrepresenting us or putting us down, we must ask God how to respond. There have been times when speaking the truth was the very best thing I could do. In fact, speaking the truth completely removed strife and issues, because the lie was shown up for what it was. There have been other times (many other times!) when I let it go; turn the other cheek, so to speak, and allow God to handle the reputation side of things. And I have watched as God brought the truth to light without me doing a thing besides being my true self.
So what can you do while you’re turning the other cheek or otherwise not defending yourself? First, you can live the truth. Not parading it in front of those who are “wrong,” but living Jesus and His love in your everyday life. Second, you can love people. It’s amazing how just loving people well will bring truth to light. Third, you can pray for the people who are against you – and I don’t mean, “God, help them to see I’m right.” I mean blessing them and asking for God’s favor on them even while they’re wrong. “Bless those who curse you,” Jesus said in Luke 6:28. Fourth, give it all to God. Living to see revenge brought out by God isn’t much of a life. Fifth, be ready to tell the truth – just do it with love and without putting others down if at all possible.
