Shame Doesn’t Lead to Repentance

Lighthouse on the Sodus Bay Pier, Sodus Point, New York
Lighthouse on the Sodus Bay Pier, Sodus Point, New York

It’s an interesting thing to be a leader in a sinful society.  Paul the Apostle was growing baby Christians in a culture so sinful it might possibly make the Western world look pure.  I won’t go into the details of their sin – it isn’t necessary – but suffice to say that they faced many of the biggest evils that the church in America is preaching against today and a few we haven’t yet dreamed about of.

Formations in Bryce Canyon, Utah
Formations in Bryce Canyon, Utah

Christian leaders in the US are actively trying to draw lines in the sand as their congregants race thoughtlessly – or even intentionally – over those lines in a headlong flow of culture, relativism, and whatever other sins you want to list.  It’s caused said leaders to react by choosing specific sins and then holding these sins up as the worst of the worst.  Anyone who does these sins is labeled a bad person, a sinful person, a person who can’t lift their head in church, and likely will be shown to the door if anyone found out about their actions or thoughts.

Doorway at the Mount Trumbull Schoolhouse, Grand Canyon-Parashant National Monument, Arizona
Doorway at the Mount Trumbull Schoolhouse, Grand Canyon-Parashant National Monument, Arizona

The problem with this approach is that it effectively removes a good percentage of society from ever being allowed into the church, let alone to have their sins forgiven, their hearts healed, and their souls given a chance at a relationship with God.

Stairway through the meadows of Spray Park, Mount Rainier National Park, Washington
Stairway through the meadows of Spray Park, Mount Rainier National Park, Washington

Jesus said, “I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners” (Mark 2:17).  He came to earth to forgive the sins of those who knew they were not righteous.  You wouldn’t believe the number of people who live sinful lives who know full well the depth of their depravity.

Inside of the Tunnel, Arches National Park, Utah
Inside of the Tunnel, Arches National Park, Utah

I’m all for calling a sin exactly what it is – a sin.  If we don’t admit to the truth, we’re keeping ourselves and others from righteousness and right-standing with God.  But admitting that robbing banks is a sin is very different from getting up on the platform at church Sunday after Sunday (not to mention social media day after day) and talking about how bank robbers will go to hell.  Any bank robber who walked in would immediately come to the conclusion that God doesn’t love them, that their sin is too great, and there’s no chance that they could ever have communion with God, let alone the children of God.

A cascade above Leigh Lake, Cabinet Mountains Wilderness, California
A cascade above Leigh Lake, Cabinet Mountains Wilderness, California

There’s no sin too big that Jesus’ blood can’t forgive.  We believe that.  And then we talk about our very own neighbors like they’ve so transgressed our pet sins that there’s no hope of redemption for them.  Some of us will shake our heads over the person reading an immoral and sexually-explicit magazine in the grocery store, yet we’ll walk right up to the cash register and tell a bald-faced lie.  There’s no real difference between the two sins – they’re both clearly a sin, they’re both forbidden in the New Testament (Revelation 21:8, etc.), and they’re both exactly the same in terms of the likelihood of being forgiven if the person repented before God.

A derelict boat in the Intracoastal Waterway, North Carolina
A derelict boat in the Intracoastal Waterway, North Carolina

I could give all kinds of examples of sins that are currently considered especially sinful by the church in North America today.  And they’re right to an extent – these sins are deadly, just like all other sins.  And somehow, we need to recognize sin of all kinds, from complaining to practicing magic arts, and steer well clear of it.  What we can’t do is to hold up sin as some special barrier to entry to God.

Mt. Baker from the Heliotrope Divide Trail, Mount Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest, Washington
Mt. Baker from the Heliotrope Divide Trail, Mount Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest, Washington

“But Anne, I don’t want my kids to see this sin right in front of them!”  Nor do I.  But maybe I can put some clarity on the issue.  Many years ago, my family attended a church where the pastor’s kids were pretty much out of control.  They argued and fought amongst themselves constantly, cheated at games, and yet somehow managed to be pretty nice people anyway.  One day, my mom said to my older brother and I, “Why don’t you ask the kids why they argue and fight all the time?  See what they say.”

Play at the Great Salt Lake, Utah
Playing at the Great Salt Lake, Utah

We did at the very next meeting.  “Oh, I don’t know,” said the oldest son with a shrug.  “We just sort of do.”  It wasn’t a satisfactory answer.  But as you see, I’ve never forgotten it.  I had a living example in front of me of people who were clearly in sin.  And while we weren’t allowed to despise them, we were encouraged to take heed – this is what this sin looks like.  God loves them.  But don’t be like them because it’s sin.  (To finish the story: I’ve run across some of the pastor’s kids since then, and they all seem to have pulled their lives together and love Jesus.  See, He does love them and helped them overcome!)

Lake Agnes, State Forest State Park, Colorado
Lake Agnes, State Forest State Park, Colorado

It’s time to start calling sin what it is: Sin, whether that’s in our own lives or recognizing it in others.  It’s also time to stop creating shame in others by holding up certain sins as unforgivable.  You see, it’s not the Shame of God that draws people to repentance; it’s the Kindness of God that makes them repent (Romans 2:4).  Or in the Message paraphrase, “You didn’t think, did you, that just by pointing your finger at others you would distract God from seeing all your misdoings and from coming down on you hard?  Or did you think that because he’s such a nice God, he’d let you off the hook?  …In kindness he takes us firmly by the hand and leads us into a radical life-change.”

Views from the Warren Peak Fire Tower, South Dakota
Views from the Warren Peak Fire Tower, South Dakota

Someone told me recently, “Hate sin for what it does to people.”  These precious people who are sinning often know the depravity of their own souls.  Yet their sin is destroying them.  It’s within our power to use the kindness of God to help them find repentance.  And if we want to see the revival that is spoken of so often today – if we want to see our schools and workplaces and neighborhoods saved – if we want to live not as Pharisees but as sons and daughters of God – we must be willing to stop shooting at sin, and instead start loving people into the Kingdom, all while hating the sin that keeps them bound until they find Christ as their Savior.

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